Tonight was the first of the last.
The first game of baseball season. Of my son’s senior year. The last FIRST game. Ever.
I’m just not even sure what to do with that.
The massive amount of emotions I feel about that is simply overwhelming.
I’ve known it was coming. But, as hard as you try, you just can’t adequately prepare yourself for it.
I think about just how many lasts and firsts are experienced in this particular year of a person’s life. There are a lot of unknowns. But there are also a lot of new discoveries.
I am trying to savor each moment I have with my senior. I’m trying to take notice of even the small things that are usually taken for granted. Table talks, back scratches, conversations about life, baseball games, and hugs. They feel different now. Sweeter.
And I think to myself….why can’t I live like that all the time? Allowing the small things in life to become greater and to be intentional about each moment. In fact, this life is fleeting and we really never know when we could, indeed, be experiencing a last. Some you know are coming, but others sneak up unannounced.
I want to live that vibrantly everyday. I want to soak in the simple things. I want to find meaning in the mundane…simply because it may never come again.
Life is about so much more than what is seen and touched. There is great meaning that lives below every surface that can only be felt with the heart. This is where we find purpose and gratitude becomes the native language. This is where your spirit becomes sensitive and things begin to feel different.
Lord, we can’t live in fear…but please help us live intentionally. We never know when we could be experiencing lasts. Help us to re-focus on the things that truly matter and allow all the other non-essentials to become invisible. Help us to see life through the eyes of gratitude. Help us to experience life as if we are truly anticipating the firsts and the lasts that are upon us. And most of all, help us to see YOU in all things…YOU are the first and the last….what WAS, and IS, and is TO COME. Amen.